Blog Archives

TSM133 : The Body of Our Life’s Work and The Bodies of Work Within Our Life

What is life ?

In today’s monologue I explore the idea of the body of our life’s work and the bodies of work within our life. I explore how our life is the sum of all our life’s work and is reflected in the final moments of who we are in our life (or at any moment) and how at any moment we are working on a body of work, whether we are conscious of it or not. I speculate that we can consciously choose the bodies of work that fill our life – whether they are visible or invisible and suggest that a life well lived, is one in which we come to understand and develop some awareness of the nature of the bodies of work that we allow to fill our life.

My iPod gave a lot of trouble during this recording and I had to stitch together separate segments after it unexpectedly shut down. Forgive any repetition !

Enjoy ! 😉

TSM113 : The Agony of the Human Condition – Part 2 : The Left Hand Path

The human condition is a strange beast and one that we all try to understand at some point in our life. The human condition is a condition of existence that is constantly in flux, where one thing always leads to another. Sometimes we experience things that we see as good (positive) and sometimes we experience things that we see as bad (negative). If we had perfect awareness we would probably only choose good things and omit bad things. But that isn’t reality ! (As Buddha said we are all addicted to like and dislike). How boring life would be if everything unfolded exactly as we wanted it to ! So what then are the implications of experiencing bad things and what does it mean when we experience ‘the left hand path’ (the path less desired) ?

Enjoy ! 😉

Related reading :

Be Yourself

Be Yourself and No One Elses Expectation of You !

Think of this as perhaps a follow on from the last post.


Creators of Experience (Steering the Dream)

A few months ago I received an email from a A (a FB friend and fellow reader of this blog) and I thought for a long time about how to respond. Along the way I received more messages than I could keep up with and just didn’t get around to responding. So today I pulled my finger out and wrote a response back to A. After sending it off I decided I would post it here (without personal details) because I’ll be away for two months after today and I thought this might provide some benefit to other people (A has given his consent to do this). And if not, I wanted to share it because A’s experience highlights how we are all struggling with the same issues, the same frustration and the same uncertainty. A is one of those people who is teaching me how to live, by reminding me that we are all fundamentally in the same place.

Thank you A for the reminder and the lesson !

I am not someone who is free of problems. I am human being and I suffer just like you. What I do have is lots of experience with suffering and an ability to reflect honestly on who I am and the mistakes I have made.

May this be of help to some one !

Brighty. 😉


Dear A :

You wrote a profound email to me that touches on many of the issues that face all of us – fear and uncertainty about how we should move through life, doubt about what we are doing and have done, wonder at possibility, pain and the sense that there is more within and without and that life is but a dream. These are things that effect all of us at different periods of our life and sometimes they are themes that return again and again. I think maybe the best way to respond to you is to address some of the key things that you said.

Thank you for what you have shared with me. It took a lot of courage to send these words to the other side of the world, without knowing how they would be interpreted.

Let me begin my response by saying this. Everyone of us tries to do our best in life – be it the most developed person in the world or the asshole or tyrant. We are all trying in one way or another. And none of us knows the one best way that we should be. There are no shoulds, only countless experiments with what seems right at the time. Sometimes we are aware of what we are doing but mostly we are not. We are all prey to the mind, as it moves between stillness/silence and mental activity/noise. We experience the inner and outer world and we like and dislike and react accordingly. Thoughts and feelings arise and we either witness them and let them go or we engage with them and get pulled along for the ride and have to endure the consequences – be they further thoughts, feelings or actions. We experience all manner of things and some are good and some are not. And along the way we suffer. Mostly we suffer because we wish things were other than how they are – the old like and dislike issue again. Real happiness, real contentment, real peace – arises when we sit with what is and there is acceptance in our hearts. And how do we do that ? By seeing all that arises in each and every moment. But that is hard work to maintain awareness 24/7. So the best that we can do is to notice whenever we remember to notice. And in these moments we see what we are experiencing within and without. And as we do, we just experience without judgement. And if we judge, we see that too and accept that it’s there.

It is OK to suffer. I don’t agree with the Buddhist doctrine that I once followed that says we should aim to be free of suffering. Because suffering is a great teacher. A teacher that transforms us and leads us towards a greater understanding of who we are and how things are. So please, don’t ever deny your suffering or see futility in it. It has enormous value to you, to all those you love, to your descendants and those effected by your life’s work.

If I have learnt one thing from Dude it is this. We are here to experience everything completely. We should love as best as we can, we should hurt as best as we can, we should suffer as best as we can, we should feel peace as best as we can, we should be kind as best as we can, we should be wild as best as we can, we should enjoy our desires and their fulfillment as best as we can and we should be who we truly are as best as we can. There is no liberation, only seeing things as they really are and being true to what we are. No becoming, just fully being. No better out there in some distant future, just this perfect moment – no matter whether it is full of pain and suffering or perfect bliss.

The problem with many entheogens, drugs, ceremonies or rituals is that they create temporary states. States in which we maybe able to see from the top of the mountain but states that are ephemeral and largely artificial. Eventually we have to come down and return to ordinary life. No higher state can last forever. Only the state of being can last forever. And sometimes being has great awareness and sometimes it has little awareness. In Buddhism there is the idea that once one reaches enlightenment and loses all sense of self, of I – that one must return to the market place with gift bearing arms (alms also). (See the Ten Ox Herding Pictures for an explanation of this journey.) What this means is that once we free ourselves from the things that bind us, we are obliged to return to normal life and to bring the gifts of what we have learned – love, awareness, compassion and so on. Because that is real enlightenment. To be able to live in the world with how things are, not on some lofty mountain or in a cave, where we are free of all problems and all agitations.

We are the main creators of the experience in some strange and fantastic way.

Yes, what you have said is true. We create reality and experience at two levels. We create reality via external perception (the 5 senses) and internal perception (mirrors of the 5 senses, thoughts, feelings, felt sense in the body, memories, values and beliefs) and through our expression of being (thoughts, feelings, behaviours and actions). We have so much more awareness and control than we ALLOW ourselves to realise. We set up so many patterns that create experience but we do not see them. Often we create incredible complexity and stress by bringing too many variables into our life. The key here is to simplify, simplify, simplify. The fewer variables in our life, the less stress we experience and the greater opportunity to be ourselves and to experience what we wish to experience.

Somehow the image stuck in my mind of our prison standing there like something that was formed by the limitations of our mind and now the limiting prison bars are not there anymore because we realized that they were created by us.

Yes you are correct. We create the limitations. It’s not that the mind is limited, it’s how we use it and experience it that is limited. Dude has the same mind as us but he differs in how he uses it.

Maybe we are not the little me running through this big world exploring this reality, maybe we are this universe that is dreaming itself.

So what are we going to dream???

Yes totally true – at one level. God and/or the universe is experiencing itself through us. But we are both the small self (little me) and the greater self (everything) together as one. There is both separation and no separation. And everything depends on how we ALLOW OURSELVES TO PERCEIVE AND TO FEEL. When we allow ourselves to regularly make the shift from small self to greater self and back again and we see that both co-exist at once, then we are free, then we OK with what is, then we are truly creators and explorers of reality.

I do have a lot of pain in my life around this so I wanted to use that.

Never let it go to waste my friend. It will utterly transform you and help you to become a guide and a teacher in your own way. And it will help you to make healthier choices in the future and to accept the choices that others make. Sometimes that is the hardest thing wanting to save others from making bad choices. Take it from someone who who has made many bad choices and sees family members make bad choices ! Learning to let go and accept the choices that others make is invaluable. I fought against accepting the choices of others for so long, wanting to prevent their suffering but by doing so I caused myself and them more stress and discomfort. If we take away others bad choices, we take away their opportunities to learn. And there is no greater teacher than pain and suffering. There is of course natural pain – changes to the body and the suffering that arises from wishing it was otherwise. And there is created pain – which is the pain that arises from situations and the suffering that arises from the like and dislike and wishing it was otherwise. But it is all unpleasant. What matters is not that it is not experienced but how we react to the experience. Can we see value in it ? Obviously you can and that makes all the difference !

Is there a way to steer the dream? How did I create this knot in my life?

How can I untie it?

I think there are a couple of interesting points here. Is what you want really what you want ? And what is at the core of this dream ? Sometimes what we really want is what is at the core of the dream and not what is on the outside. And yes, there is a way to steer the dream. First we should let go of all expectation and learn to accept what is. Be satisfied with what we have experienced because maybe that is what we really needed. Second, we can choose to react less and to make better choices by thinking through the consequences of all of our actions. We can think about what we want in our life and what steps would be required to reach it/achieve it, what good and what bad will arise as a result of these steps and to take action in this direction. Third, we can constantly evaluate – is this the direction wish to go in ? Why, why not ? What can I do about it ? What do I control and what don’t I control ? We can visualise aspects of our life that we wish to come to fruition and imagine how it feels to experience them – to see them as we wish them to be and bring that feeling into our day to day experience, rather than letting doubt sabotage our experience. Or we can throw away all anchors related to a future destination and just experience what life brings us, being satisfied that this is where we need to be. As to how you created this knot. It was created by causes and effects – one thing led to another. Much of it the result of your thinking and feeling and dwelling on certain beliefs, ideas and images. Much of it influenced by many different layers of conditioning. What may look like a knot may really be a puzzle or series of paths. The knot maybe an illusion or a mis-perception. How you got to that point, was by making choices in thinking, feeling and action, that may have sometimes been done from a place with little awareness. So don’t untie what may not exist. See what is and choose to function in a way that leads to healthier choices – thoughts, feelings and actions.

Maybe the ETs see a certain sacredness around what we believe and do not want to point out that we could believe something different, because it is our “ god given right to believe whatever the fuck we want and they love us no matter what…?

Spot on A ! They respect how we are and will only guide us or teach us when we ask for help and only if they feel we truly need it.

You said sacredness and I interpret that as holiness or beauty or uniqueness and I think they see that. Our belief is our belief and they do not believe they have any right to interfere with that. Sure they want to see us grow up but we have to get there the hard way – by growing though suffering – not by having someone wave a wand and fixing everything.

I dont really have a recipe yet for changing my belief etc. above but think that for me realizing this is a good and probably the biggest start. Maybe its BS but for some reason I have been leaning this way.

Yes, that is good A. Start with where you’re at. Don’t try to be anything other than what you are. In time your beliefs will change according to your feelings and your perceptions of your experiences. But I think its best to let them change naturally, organically – rather than forcing them to change – especially because someone tells you to. That’s why you should take everything I say and check how you feel about it and then throw it all out. If it has any value, it will come back to you, after you live and see if it’s true.

I have been in fear around finances most of my life actually and am ready for something new. All my spiritual search and ayahuasca ceremonies has not helped with it yet though.

I understand the fear around finances A. I too experienced a great deal of fear regarding money. But financial poverty has also partly been a choice in my own life. I have been rich in time and relationships and experiences. If I learned one thing, it is to accept the fear and let it go. Money comes and goes. If you want permanently good finances, you have to be willing to give up other things. For most people it is time. I value time and so I have an old ratty house and little money for other things. In much of Australia Affluenza is killing people. They have perfect cars and houses and miserable lives, stress, anxiety and sickness. What they need is time and opportunities to discover what else they are, apart from their work roles. They lack the willingness to give up so called security and step into the unknown. Your being ready for something new is a wonderful place to be. You can build on that by seeing where you are and by focusing on what you have. With that behind you, step into the unknown. Take risks regarding your future and see where it takes you. Focus on enjoyment and gratitude and not on the difficulty and wishing things were different.

As to the spiritual search and Ayahuasca ceremonies – seeking is not the way. Living and trusting are the way. LIVE FULLY. FEEL EVERYTHING. TRUST IN YOU AND WHERE YOU ARE GOING. There is no better place than here ! Seeking becomes an obstacle because it implies that what I need is out there in the future somewhere. The seeking mind – that aspect of your mind that seeks – cannot stop seeking because that is what it does. It’s role is to seek. So there will always be something more to find. Something else with all the answers. Something else to help you see, to help you experience, to provide you with lasting peace and fulfilment. Enjoy learning about new things but do not allow your total being to be driven by the seeking mind. See how it functions and let it go. Picture if you will a man in a cave who cannot see out. There is a voice on the outside saying, “I know the way out of the cave. I have all the answers. Follow me.” Only when the man ignores the voice, trusts in himself and his own perception, does he see that the cave is just an illusion. Turn to no one to help you find the way. Turn only to yourself and trust in what you learn.

I think we believe a certain believe until it falls away in a way.

Yes, yes, yes. Growth is all about letting go. The more we let go, the more that what is always inside of us comes through. We shed away beliefs like layers of skin. At the core of our being is a great luminosity upon which all belief has been created. I think that one of the important functions of ageing (and I include here growing old, sick and dying) is learning to see how things are and learning to let go of everything – especially our beliefs. Because beliefs get in the way of what is. And what is fluctuates in every moment. Life is eternal fluctuation without any certainty or permanence – only the illusion of certainty and permanence.



The image you attached of the sheep all crowding in to get through the fence and then moving outwards, is a very powerful image. We are like that, bound by the limitations we create within our minds and by the way we add complexity to our lives. One one side of the fence are those who are bound by complexity, stress, worry, obligation, responsibility, becoming and on the other side of the fence are those who recognise choice, simplicity, the flux of mental states, cause and effect, acceptance, mature responsibility and being. We can choose to recognise where we are and to make changes to how we function, in such a way as to exist on the other side of the fence. It does not always depend on favourable conditions. They can help but the greatest benefit arises from seeing how we function.

Thank you A for reaching out to me ! I do not know much of anything and you should check everything I have said with your own heart and mind. But I do understand how suffering feels from my own experiences. If I am a master of anything, it is a master of suffering. My life has not turned out at all the way I had thought it would be or the way that I wished it would be. But it is perfect and I am grateful for all my suffering, all my mistakes, all my stuff ups, all the poverty and all the connections I have made with other human beings, who have also found themselves trying to swim to the other shore. As I have said many times before, we are like children placing our big toe into an endless sea, uncertain of what to do. We know nothing but everything that we need is inside of us. We are the countless small children afraid to enter the sea but we are also the sea. The difference between humans and ETs, is that they know their true nature.

Trust my friend that that aspect of you that is luminous and eternal knows exactly what you need to do and what is best for you. Who knows what the tide may bring ?


What’s My Scene ?

What’s My Scene ? I was 18 when this song by the Hoodoo Goorus came out in 1987.
I was living with a pedophile uncle, having fled boarding school the year before; my Dad lived in Hong Kong, my sister was in boarding school 3 hours away and my mum lived 1000 km away; I had a couple of buddies after being a loner for so long; I was at school with girls and boys after 5 1/2 years in a boys boarding school; my uncle was bonking an 18 year old floozy, drinking heavily, bashing people up and doing lots of drugs; and his buddy was bonking a huge breasted woman called JUGS, who tried to seduce me (my hands found their way to the crack in her jeans but fortunately didn’t go any further); and I was otherwise a very fucking confused kid ! Some songs define a period of our life ! What’s My Scene was one such song in what might have been one of the best and worst years of my life. 

The next song to define my life was U2’s I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For. It was a song that resonated with me because it reminded me that I had been seeking something that was always beyond my grasp. I didn’t even know what I was seeking because it was so fucking illusive. It was also the song that encouraged me to begin writing for myself (something I’d forgotten until Dude reminded me a few years ago). And without the entire Joshua Tree album, I don’t know how I would have made it through my final year of high school. Around the same time I was enjoying U2, I was also listening to INXS and the song Mediate made me realize that poetry didn’t have to rhyme. I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For and Mediate laid the foundation for my life as a writer and gave me the inspiration to see that writing could save me from what was quickly becoming the darkest period of my life.

There are many more songs that define 1987 for me but these 3 three speak loudest. I can’t listen to any of these songs, without remembering this period of my life.

Back then I was a lonely kid with a small ghetto blaster and an old stereo from the 70’s, living in his uncle’s garage. Today we have so many ways to enjoy music and to connect with people who are similar to us. No one has to be alone, the way that we used to be.

It’s funny how music binds our memories and memories bind our feelings. I wonder if there are songs that define periods of your life ?


Why “ET and I” May Not Be 4U (or Why Bright Garlick Might Piss You Off)

I woke up this morning at 5 am and went for my ‘at least once a night’ pee and then couldn’t get back to sleep. Sometimes having one kidney sucks ! I had breakfast and checked my email, where I discovered a comment from one of my readers – Relax 24. I watched the sun rise and then at 6 am I started mowing the 8 foot high grass. While I was mowing I found myself thinking about numerous comments that different people have said to me over the years about the many different subjects I have talked about here and in the real world. Then I had a conversation with Dude about my health, the outcome of the US presidential election and parallel realities. Dude knew that something was bothering me, so we talked about that as well.

Over the last 16 years that I have been sharing aspects of my life with strangers (people I am likely to never meet in person) online. I have always been incredibly candid about my life and back when I started sharing online, I shared way too much ! Ever since day one, there have been people who have taken a dislike to me or to things that I have said. It has happened ever since I was a little boy, so I shouldn’t ever have been surprised that it happened on line. Many years ago I provided an online counselling service to people before that field blossomed and also worked as a therapist/counselor in private practice and for numerous agencies. I was good at what I did and people came to me because I was caring and was able to give them something they needed. But I’ve never had anyone I could go to, except my best friend, who happened at the time to be my wife. We’re no longer together but she is still my best friend (which is why she gets mentioned here on a regular basis). Other than Rachel and a couple of friends who live 3-4 hours away. I live a very hard, solitary life with my son, in the middle of no where. I don’t easily mix with people and people irritate me. But I like some people and I miss being involved with people. Which is why I’m keen to start the heavy metal choir I’ve mentioned before. But I’ve never had regular company that I could connect with or share an intellectual conversation with. So when things arise that are difficult for me, like many of you, I have to find ways to deal with them myself. Online support is great but it’s one dimensional compared to a real person. Which is why for me ET contact has become so important. The ETs don’t judge me for who I am and will listen when I need help. But they are not us and so sometimes, even I miss a little human one on one.

I began blogging in 2009 because one day I plucked up the courage and decided I wanted to share my story about having had contact with extraterrestrials. Later I felt the urge to teach others what I had learned about initiating ET contact and hence this blog. Along the way, I realized that blogging had become a way to connect with the human world and to express myself. I had worked in so many roles where I could not express who I really am and it made me sick. It literally contributed to the development of my tumours. So when I discovered the power of blogging, I began to enjoy expressing myself. I had been working on my other writing (novels etc) but those are labours of love and hate that are taking years to create and they are all done in isolation, thus far without any feedback ! Through blogging I had at last found a medium where the ‘I’ could come out. But blogging hasn’t all been good and neither has making videos. I’ve had death threats, hate mail and messages, nasty comments and criticisms. Some of the criticisms have been reasonable but others have not. Because of the threats, I have had to take extreme measures to protect my privacy and my son. I’ve also had ongoing monitoring and occasional physical surveillance, which sometimes makes me wish I’d never expressed anything about the ET subject. Blogging has also made me very physically sick, from spending too much time exposed to strong EMFs associated with computers and from giving away too much energy. Hence the reason I am about to have a 2 month hiatus from the internet !

Despite the challenges associated with blogging I continue to blog because it fills some deep need in me to express myself. So while most blogs about ETs or Aliens are just about that subject, this blog is about other things as well, that interest me. And I think one of the things that pisses me off, is that people go seeking out all this stuff about ETs and the paranormal and all they want is the good stuff, the quick fix, like the junkie who needs shot of heroin. Why would you do that ? None of us are like that in real life ? We’re all so much more than one subject. No one is a two dimensional cut out ? We all have so much more to who were are and its the ‘so much more’ that makes us all who we are – unique individuals, who deserve to be heard. So when you read ET and I, you’re going to get a good dose of the I, because I am here expressing myself and trying to share with you the story of how one human being connects with the world and connects with our cosmic family. To understand ET contact, you have to understand the person who is having the contact. So if you really want to have contact with ETs, you have to understand yourself more than anything else ! You have to know what makes you tick and then you can have a completely transparent and honest relationship with the ETs. So I write about all that other stuff because it is just as important as knowing what to do to have contact. If I had to distill how to have ET contact into 2 sentences it would look like this :

  • Know thyself completely.
  • Open your mind and heart to any possibility.

Let me be perfectly frank with you. I am far from perfect. I have many faults and imperfections. My tumours sometimes make me grumpy and bad tempered. I despise much of the human world and see the human world as secondary in importance to the natural world. I am also honest, open minded and open hearted and value integrity and critical thinking. I believe many things which even I would once have thought were impossible or delusional. And sometimes I make the mistake of sharing too much about my life, my beliefs or my experiences. I have a quiet life and the internet fills an important void of human connection. But its easy for me to go too far and to forget that people haven’t had the experiences I’ve had and don’t understand things the way that I do. Relax 24 expressed his doubts this morning regarding my recent predictions, Dude’s reality and the proof of my ET contact. Those are all perfectly reasonable doubts and I suspect that Relax represents a sizable proportion of my readers who also feel that way. Relax has been a regular commenter and has been a great source of encouragement. But he is entitled to express his frustrations with this blog or with me. As he suggested, he was entitled to his own monologue and for that I thank him. There have been many others who have been far more critical and others still who have been down right vicious !

I do however need to be true to my self, just as Relax is being true to his self. So I will continue to post on a range of subjects, that may seem unrelated to the ET subject. I will probably post things or say stupid things that I wish I hadn’t. I’ve made mistakes all my life and that habit doesn’t appear to be getting any better ! I will continue to try and explain my insights into the nature of the self and my experiments with reality and with the self. I will continue to talk about the constructs of the human psyche I call Aspects of Self and my experiments with different aspects, including the aspect called Alapo (it’s a pity that Relax didn’t react to the exercise that came from Alapo ( (If I’m frustrated with you Relax, it’s because you missed the whole point of that post and I regret that I responded to your initial comment with a prediction !). One of the reasons I started The Something Monologues (not that I realized at the time), was that I needed to express other things and some of those other things are critically important to expanding an understanding of the nature of reality. But very few people seem to see any value in the TSMs ! So I am unsure if I will continue making them in the new year. My Podbean renewal is up and I need money for my treatment !

So I try to give what I can here because that’s my fundamental nature. If you keep an open heart and an open mind, anything is possible. But you have to be willing to work at learning. You can’t just seek and find because then you’ll get caught in the trap of perpetual seeking or getting attached to certain individuals who think they know everything. I am here to push you back to you ! Stop looking outwards and START TRUSTING IN YOU !

As I’ve said before, I am never going to try to prove to you that I have had ET contact. There is not a damned thing I can do to prove anything because anything I do will be proved to be false. Even if someone provided a real life ET, people would find ways to prove it’s not real. And besides, why does one need to prove everything ? Do we prove love or prove our own conception or prove belief ? The best I can do is to guide you towards understanding your own nature and how to initiate your own ET contact. And when you have REAL CONTACT, then you will know what is real and what is not. And if you don’t have contact, maybe you really are not ready. You may think you are but you may not be.

From time to time you will hear me rally against many of the popular mythologies about ETs that people try to pass for truth. I am here in part to help you see clearly and to put forth an antidote that counters that kind of shit. See here for a reminder of the stuff I think is crap that many people take to be real. I feel its important to take a stand against many of these mythologies because they are distorting peoples perception of reality and harming our potential relationships with ETs and the future of all of our descendants !

From time to time I will talk about things that maybe foreign to you. If you find that I am talking about some weird aspect of myself called Alapo, listen to what I have said about Aspects of Self, learn what you can about ideas like sub personalities and Transpersonal Psychology and then venture out and see what you can open yourself to. You never know what experiences maybe possible, until you let go of who you think you are ! It took me years to get to the place of experiencing, understanding and believing the things that are now part of my life, so I don’t expect any of you to make sense of much of what I share ! But I encourage you to test everything for yourself !

I am going to continue to talk about The Architecture because I know that it exists and because I know people and ETs in it. I think the world needs to know how enmeshed The Architecture and a larger structure I call The Diamond Complex (to be explained next year), are  in the modern world and how much is controlled that you know nothing about. But I will continue to remind you that you make choices every moment about every aspect of your life, no matter how much some other power structure influences our world. I also want to teach you how to find evidence regarding who these groups are and I have to do this carefully, so as not to put myself in harms way.

I am also going to continue to harp on about the population crisis and the need for population control because the destiny of all future generations of living beings on this planet depend on us addressing the issue. Biodiversity loss is the most important issue facing Earth and the ETs who care for us and the primary cause is the ever expanding human population. So expect me to continue to rattle that hornets nest because I give shit and have no fear of those who oppose it. I am playing my small part in helping to create a movement that will change the face of the planet in centuries to come !

I will talk more about surveillance because I believe in the human right to privacy and totally object to orchestrated war and oppression of all human rights. I have about 25 unfinished posts that I started about 2 years ago and several of them are on this subject.

I’m very good at starting with part 1 or 2 and forgetting to finish what I started or losing interest in the subject, so I hope to finish several unfinished subjects.

Tomorrow I turn 47 and I’m so grateful to still be alive. The only aim I have in life is to make it to 50 and if I get to 50, then 60. I never thought at 47 I’d be writing about extraterrestrials or any of the subjects I write about. I’m a very quiet person who avoids people and yet here I am thrusting myself out into the world like a giant purple pecker saying, “Here I am. Anyone for ice cream ?”. I’m an introvert and all introverts have  a suppressed extrovert aspect to themselves. The more we suppress it, the sicker we get. But it isn’t just because we need to be noticed. We all have something of value to give to the world and if we suppress that we suffer immeasurable loss and grief.

So I don’t know what’s coming next. Not tomorrow, not next post, not next year or when I start my treatment next month. But that is one of the joys of life. That it is inherently unpredictable. So expect me to be unpredictable without any expectation of what’s coming next !

No hard feelings Relax ! Your honesty is invaluable !

Thank you to all of you for giving one nobody down under a place to express himself.

Thank you WordPress for the opportunity to be me !


Bright John Garlick. 😉



As a therapist/group work facilitator and just an ordinary human being, I worked with a lot of people who had very, very sad lives and I saw a lot of very sad things. But wherever I could I tried to bring light into people’s lives, to alleviate their sadness – if not permanently, then just for a little while.

I’m going to bed soon, so some other time I’ll share some stories of sadness with you but until then I wonder if you might share your own or someone else’s story of sadness with the rest of us !

Rather than fixing everything, sometimes we just need to sit with how things are. There is nothing more powerful than just being present for another living creature. No doing, just being. So let the sadness come…


TSM100 : The Illusion of a Singular Physical Self & the Microbiomes Within

As someone who has always been obsessed with microbial life, I have been fascinated with how microbes play a role in every single ecosystem – including within our bodies. A recent discussion with Dude about the human need for Round Worms and Thread Worms (yes you read correctly), led us to an interesting exploration of Microbiomes and how modern humans have disturbed their natural bodily systems.

In today’s monologue I explore what it means to have a singular physical self, in view of the fact that we contain countless biomes – made up of organisms from the 5 kingdoms (Monera, Fungi, Protista, Plantae, Animalia) and the potential implications that these microbiomes have for our mental/emotional and physical health and ability to communicate with the other parts of us.

Enjoy ! B. 😉

Those who want to really understand this idea in depth, should read the works of Lynn Margulis :

Relevant links :

Here are some cool videos related to this monologue.


TSM99 : An Extraterrestrial Explanation of Past Lives, Future Lives & Parallel Lives

I’ve had many talks with my ET friend Dude about the nature of reality and the self. In today’s monologue I reflect on a recent talk, in which Dude put forward a metaphorical explanation for understanding all of a person’s lives – their apparent past lives, future lives and parallel lives. I found Dude’s explanation very confronting, especially when I sat down and thought about it’s implications. It is my wish that Dude’s explanation also pushes you way beyond your comfort zone. Dude offered this explanation, as an antidote to Buddhist ideas of a subtle self, reincarnating in and out of time.

And for those who may be wondering, Dude had a significant impact on my decision to abandon many Buddhist teachings and my beginning to question many of it’s core doctrines.

Its is my wish that this monologue makes you deeply uncomfortable with many of our contemporary beliefs and encourages you to explore the potential implications of Dude’s explanation. The implications are far reaching and potentially relate to everything that we know as reality.

This monologue might appeal to people with an interest in time travel, reincarnation, multiverses, the afterlife and the nature of the self.

In the first section of today’s monologue I give you an update on a new treatment option I’m considering for my tumours. So you’ll have to skip to the 19 minute mark to hear about Dude’s ideas.

Enjoy ! 😉 B.


ETs and Up – Knowing Us Intimately

Today I spoke to my sister, who as some of you know is very ill with brain tumours. During our conversation I became painfully aware of the people around her and how their lives are likely to unfold as she gets sicker and later when she’s no longer here. When I worked in psychotherapy with individuals and groups, I developed many intimate relationships with people, in which I became aware of how different lives were unfolding and likely to unfold. Every now and then I meet a former client or hear about a former client and have some sense of how their life has unfolded many years down the track. It’s nice to imagine that things have turned out well but that isn’t always the case. Sometimes people’s lives have unfold differently to what I would have imagined but often they have unfolded in the way that I had imagined – following the patterns that I saw when I was in contact with them.

One of my favourite documentaries of the last 30 years is the Up series, which began with 7-Up. (I think I’ve spoken about this documentary before – here or on my old blog.) The Up series follows the lives of fourteen 7 year old English kids, throughout their life, interviewing them at 7 year intervals. The last in the series was 56 Up and the next one is 63 Up, in 2019. At this point I guess the series will continue until the participants die or the director dies. The series has also inspired many other Up series in other countries but most of those are well behind the original series.

What I love about the series, is seeing how an individuals life unfolds – sometimes in ways that are easy to predict and sometimes in ways that are totally unpredictable. It’s also fascinating to see the drama and how individual people deal with the situations that life has thrown up. I think watching the series also helps us to feel great empathy for the individuals who have allowed their lives to be laid bare to the world. In each of the characters we see someone we know and maybe sometimes we even see ourselves.

I think a series like Up is good for the entire human race and I believe that we need more longitudinal studies and documentaries to help us make sense of our lives and to teach us how to live !

I think almost all of us can see what’s good about programs like these. Although the people who opted out of the original documentary might disagree. I think if we allow ourselves to enter into the lives of the people in these films without judgment, we begin to see how most people are trying their best and sometimes things just happen. I feel strongly that films like this help us to see the human condition as it really is – at least to some degree. We never really know the internal experiences of another person but by looking at their outward lives through time, we begin to have some kind of understanding of what life has felt like for them and what their struggles and joys have been.

I’ve said before that there are many ETs who know us better than we now ourselves. So let me clarify that a little, in the context of the UP series. There are ETs like the Muajra, Sar’won’dee, Teal’hia and Sarpalxn; who know us across life times. They know each individual life from the inside and the outside. They know our thoughts, feelings, beliefs, values, bodies and internal and external experiences. Some, like the one’s above, also have the ability to record every moment of our lives  – in a way that is beyond our comprehension. I’ve had it explained to me but I can never explain it to you because it was explained in ways I don’t have access to or fully understand. There are also ETs based on Earth who collate records on every person who has ever existed. Those of you who have heard me speak of Dude and Number 1, maybe interested to know that they control these records. Records which are kept in a physical form in several buildings on different continents. The ETs have a surprisingly large volume of information on your average human being. I won’t tell you for now why they keep these records but suffice to say it is because they value our lives and not for any insidious reason. They also have equivalent energetic records, which mirror the physical records and energetic records of our entire experience of being.

Some of these ETs know every aspect of our existence – in this life and in others. Naturally as a result of knowing us so well,  they know everything about humanity – all our disciplines, all our history, all our secrets, all our plans. etc. In every sense they have a god like presence in our lives – totally hidden but always aware. Therefore they act in ways that reflect what they know. This has certain implications which are far reaching for all of us and all of humanity now and in the future. First, they have Earth’s best interests at heart. Second, they have each of our best interests at heart. Some of the other implications, which I am sure that you can deduce from what I have said, include (but are not limited to) the following :

  • They know what is best for us, based on billions of years of experience in creating life forms and in nurturing them.
  • Any official disclosure of the ET presence on Earth and our true origins has and always will be controlled by the ETs.
  • The ETs established and maintain the secrecy, as they have done for 5,500 years on Earth. They do this to protect us from ourselves. In the structure that I refer to as The Architecture, the ETs control unidirectional information flow from the lower arms of The Architecture. The lower arms were created by humans and humans created different types of secrecy to protect different vested interests. The ETs know every single thing they do ! The upper components of The Architecture will be here for thousands of years. The lower arms of The Architecture have a finite life and are allowed to exist for very specific reasons. On other planets there is no secrecy, as those races were able to deal with THE TRUTH. We are not like them and have never been able to deal with THE TRUTH. The ETs are aware of all probable futures in which we are exposed to THE TRUTH and so chose the best possible solution to help us mature.
  • The ETs know which humans to have open contact with and which humans not to have open contact with.
  • The ETs work with humans in covert projects for specific reasons that have to do with creating the healthiest possible timeline for our descendants. They do not do this work to assist humans with vested interests to gain what they want. These are merely peripheral outcomes, which the ETs fully understand.
  • Knowing us intimately helps the ETs to tolerate our weaknesses and to nurture us slowly, in ways that help our individual and collective development.
  • The ETs have and will always give specific individuals certain abilities to nurture the well being of the planet and humanity. They know how individual lives will unfold and who has the best temperament and constellation of physical and emotional traits to aid the development of certain abilities. They also know what abilities are needed at what time and the impact these will have on the species, the planet and the individual lives of the people with the abilities.
  • The ETs know which individuals they can choose to assist in the development of specific areas which effect the human race. For example, they know the best scientists to work with, the best communicators, the best therapists, the best architects and designers, the best inventors, the best mathematicians and physicists etc.  They may even work with someone to develop something that has negative consequences for the human race, if that leads to a healthier timeline for the human race or for Earth. See my post on Dude’s work with Ascanio Sobrero and how that inspired Alfred Nobel to unleash hell !
  • The ETs understand the human life cycle well – in an individual life and across life times. They understand the patterns that rule our lives. They know what we need and when we need it. They know how individual situations are likely to effect our growth.
  • The ETs understand human civilization well and how human civilizations rise and fall. They understand the patterns that rule our collective behaviour and history. They know what events are necessary to bring about certain changes in our collective growth.
  • Because the ETs understand our lives and how short our lives are by comparison to their own, they have great empathy for us. They do not have compassion because they just do what needs to be done, which is what you do when you have real awareness. But they do have great feeling for us. Although we may not always recognize it.

Anyway, that’s just a short list. I leave it to you to think about the implications that arise from the ETs knowing everything about us.

Check our Neil’s story below, for a sense of what it might be like to be an ET and have feeling for a being with a very short life.

I tried hard to find the entire Up series online but couldn’t find it. Maybe it’s out there somewhere. If you can’t find it, do yourself a favour and buy the whole series !


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