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The Hardest Things About Sharing ET Contact

When I made a decision in 2000 to first start sharing my ET contact experiences, I did so reluctantly, with little sense of just how much hostile criticism I’d receive. At the time, I was going through an incredibly hard time after the birth of my son the year before. He was born with congenital heart disease and we were paranoid that we would lose him. I had also gone back to study social work and on my off days I was working at a piggery (where I reluctantly injected 5,000 pigs a day with growth hormonen – a job I hated !), just to keep my car on the road. Life was fucking hard and I was struggling to cope ! To top it off I was having otherworldly experiences that left me feeling very alone. There was no one apart from Rachel, who I could turn to to make sense of things. So I turned to the internet. But in the end all I found was hostility and judgement and so I turned my back on sharing until I started my last blog Otherworldly Encounters in 2009.

From 1991 – when I had my first conscious encounter, onwards, I had but one other person in my life to help make sense of what was happening when I/we experienced these encounters. I found little if any help on the internet ! The only real help of any value that I found, was the work of Dr John Mack – which highlighted that other experiencers were having similar struggles integrating their experiences. Later, conversations with Preston Dennett confirmed my suspicions about the types of people that ETs were in contact with. Overall I found that most of the material about ET contact on the internet, was a repetition of the same old garbage and cultural memes and it just didn’t resonate with what I was experiencing. Even to this day, that is still the case. It was only by talking to people like Preston, that it became clear to me that much of what passes as contact on the internet, isn’t what people are experiencing in actuality.

When I began sharing, I turned to the internet looking for help but after turning my back on the internet for 8 years, I returned, not to seek help but to share a different perspective on the phenomenon. I was still active on the internet from 2001-2008, I just didn’t share anything. Instead I did what I did in the early 90’s with the ARRNet (when monochrome green was hot and waiting a day for a reply was fast) – I read as much as I could online and tried to figure out just what it was that people believed they were experiencing. Over the course of that time, I came to see my own experiences completely differently to most people and to see the wider phenomenon in a completely different light. One which included an all pervasive psychological perspective that remained largely hidden from popular discourse. I also came to see that the general perceptions of ET contact were shaped by what I came to think of as Americanism (Whiteyitis or Californicated Thinking) – something to this day I detest and which most people appear to remain completely unaware of.

I thought sharing would be easier because the subject had been out in the public domain for almost another decade and I thought people were more open. But sharing wasn’t any easier ! In the first few months that I began sharing I received regular hate mail and nasty messages. I also received a couple of death threats (one of which came from a supposed serial killer who I challenged online, independent of the ET subject). When I posted my first videos, the hate mail and nasty messages intensified and it became very personal. One person, Robbert van den Broeke (a fraud if ever there was ! – even went so far as to wish that I would die of cancer, at a time when my tumours had returned with a vengeance and I was very sick (he claimed of course that someone had hijacked his email !). I had been a member of several forums and eventually I left Project Avalon Forum because the hostility was making me sicker. I was a fool to have ever joined that group but I did meet some very good people there !



In 2012 a small time Hollywood actor sent me a small HD video camera and encouraged me to make a How to Make Contact video series. Something I had already considered but wanted to do when I was ready and up to it. I mean my tumours had returned the year before and I still felt pretty shit ! As kind as this person’s gesture was, I wasn’t willing to be controlled by someone else. This person planned on scripting the project and I suspect editing the series and when I said ‘No, I’m not ready !’, he became very aggressive and nasty and demanded I send the camera back. I did so and he claimed he never received the camera back. I didn’t pay for tracking because I didn’t care to pay, I just wanted the camera and the controlling ego out of my life ! Fortunately that was the end of it and I haven’t heard from him since !

A few years ago a well known person in this field wrote to me under a pseudonym and offered to help my son and I financially and to visit, at a time when I was very sick and had my first fundraiser. Rachel and Dude had warned me what he was about to do, so I promptly ignored his emails. I appreciated the offer but I didn’t appreciate him pretending to be someone else. I felt like he wanted to know what I know. Now unlike a lot of people, I don’t hate this person. There are a lot of things he has said and done I don’t like but I also acknowledge that he has done a lot of good and created a lot of healthy dialogue about this subject. I would just have preferred that he was transparent. And I know he isn’t the only person or agency to have written to me under a pseudonym.

Since those first videos many people have attacked me for mumbling. Little do they know I’ve been critiqued for that since I was at university. Sometimes I do talk quietly and here’s why. In the late 80’s and early 90’s I listened to a lot of heavy metal and noise at high volume and I did some significant damage to my ear drums – so much so that today I can’t hear certain frequencies. When I speak, things seem louder than they actually are. I’ve done a lot of group work and public speaking and I actually have a very loud voice when I choose to project it (I always thought I’d like to have a go at one of those heavy metal growling world records). But out here, I live a very quiet life with my son and the trees and the birds. I have no reason to speak loud. So when I make a recording I often forget to speak louder because it sounds loud enough to my ears. It’s just one of those petty little things that pisses me off and prevents me from wanting to share more. These days I have a thicker skin but it’s still annoying !



In early 1994 I was a no one, invisible to everyone – except a covert group that was in contact with Dude (but I didn’t know that then). Then when I met Rachel in late 1994, I came under the scrutiny of the same group in England (via a well known tech company in Australia). They did their normal surveillance and screened my family. They discovered I had an uncle who was a former con, a paedophile and a drug addict and that my mother had OCD and had suffered post natal depression. I was deemed a weak link but of no significant threat. I never made a splash at school or university. I worked hard and remained out of sight. And yet I felt very much like the Julian Assanges of the world. But no one in 1994 knew that because I’d never done anything subversive. Then after I started my blog in 2009 I became aware of the online monitoring of all our electronic communications. Rachel had warned me about the extent of global surveillance (details of which go further than you’ve heard from Snowden so far) in late 94 but back then I was dubious about her claims. Since then, nearly everything she disclosed to me (the general outlines – she was careful not to breach her security oath) has come to light in the public domain. Dude further clarified many of the things she’d hinted at and the workings of The Architecture.

Up until 2012 I did little to protect my privacy. The only thing I did do from about 2005, is that when I wanted to research something potentially delicate, I did it in a public library (under a pseudonym if I had to) and in internet cafe’s, so that I wouldn’t leave any kind of personal trace. And it’s something I still do today to protect my privacy. I only ever research things from home, that I’m totally comfortable with others knowing. Everything else is done off site. I never talk about important things over the phone !

In 2007 I stopped using a mobile phone on a frequent basis and stopped carrying one around in 2012. Partly for health reasons and partly for privacy. I only ever use my son’s phone or an old phone, if I have to. I don’t carry one, travel with one, store anything of value or upload any information of importance on a mobile phone. I often travel a long way from home without a phone. Just like the good ole days, when we survived without them !

After I shared my first videos in 2012, I became aware of physical monitoring – when a number of individuals with connections to SAIC ( came to investigate my January 19th 2011 experience in Halls Gap, Grampians. I was told they were coming before they arrived and saw evidence of their visit. One day I actually watched them assessing the sight. The monitoring continued after 2012 (but it may have been a different group) and I realised that the more I give out, the more they’re going to keep tabs on what I claim to experience. It was obvious that they want to know what is real and what is not. I knew from Rachel’s previous work that this is what certain agencies do. They investigate and monitor significant claims of ET contact. Some turn out to be bogus and others turn out to be real. The difference between the work done by the group that investigated my contacts and Rachel’s group was that her group used gifted psychics to bilocate back to potential events to confirm if they were real and the SAIC related group simply collected residual site data. Both groups were involved in surveillance and monitoring targeted individuals.

Later when we moved back to our farm, the surveillance and monitoring continued and as a result I set up a series of trail cameras around the property to collect evidence of subversive activity. I know they watch our home from time to time and have photos of our home and probably have satellite imagery but I don’t really care. Dude or one of the other ETs will always tell me when they’re coming.

I’ve come to accept that surveillance and monitoring are apart of life. What these groups don’t seem to realise is that it’s helped me to build a profile on them and to learn who they are – both electronically and psychically !

I’ve come to detest the surveillance and monitoring but I know that these people are only doing their job. It’s their controllers I hate. And I mean hate. I don’t back away from feeling that emotion. No love and light here ! I know the kinds of activities these people orchestrate and I utterly loath what they represent !

The thing I really dislike however are the crazies. The nutcases who pose a real threat to my life and the lives of people I care about. These people are often religious fundamentalists but not always. The fact that I suggest that space faring ETs are benevolent in nature and want to teach people how to make contact, seems to attract the worst kinds of human beings. The one’s who relish division and separation and who seem to see me as some kind of devil who needs to be eliminated. I’ve had run ins with a few of these kinds of people (even worked with a few) and I feel that the world is better off without them ! They pose a threat to anyone who comes in contact with them. And I have no time for them. That’s why I will never disclose where I live (at the time) and why begrudgingly, I must remain totally quiet about my experiences in my local community.

Before my sister died, I had told her a number of things about my ET contact experiences and I even asked Dude to visit her on her death bed – which he did. Two of my other sisters know a little about what I have experienced and my mother knows a little. But as yet I have been unable to approach the issue with my father. And that is incredibly difficult to sit with because it means that my father will never really know who I am. My experiences are such an integral part of my experience of life and it really hurts me that I have to partition myself around my father. My father maybe open to the subject. I don’t know. I know he saw UFOs on radar when he was flying in the RAAF and he has at times expressed an openness to the subject (while at other times expressed ridicule of the subject). But it is for example, a big leap from UFOs on radar to Dude and Anamika or to disclosing that the ETs showed me his daughters looming death years before it happened ! I’ve come close to opening up a few times but have been cautioned that now is not the time and in hindsight I think it would have been a mistake. But I would like to imagine that I can share some of my experiences with my father before one of us dies !

After 2012 when I began sharing my experiences on video, I decided I would try and tell the story of several of my encounters in full. But I quickly realised that it took more effort than I realised and it was exhausting. Add the dumb comments and the hostility and it just didn’t seem worth it. Which is why I have’t done much since. When my tumours returned in 2011, I thought I should share what I could – just in case I didn’t make it. Then as my health grew worse I realised that I was making things worse by sharing, so I pulled back. Now it’s all about harmony. I have to harmonise between giving and receiving. I can’t afford to share unless it’s worth it. I don’t have the energy to share when it makes me sicker. Staying alive is my number one priority. My son is my number two priority. Sharing my ET contact experiences, just doesn’t rate on a list of my priorities. So I share when I can. When I’m up to it and when I feel it’s worth it. I can’t share when it compromises my health or my life ! It isn’t that important ! But I’ve made lots of mistakes and been a fool for making myself so sick ! I have no one to blame but myself !



At different times, so many people have tried to gain something from me for nothing. What do I mean by that ? I mean they want something that I have, in return for nothing. For a long time I did that. I answered every email, every message, every comment and I responded to every attack- no matter how much it drained me or made me feel sick. I was a complete dickhead ! So these days I have to ask myself, ‘What’s in it for me ?’. Now that might seem awfully selfish but my life depends on it ! I have to figure out if every single interaction is worth it ! I have to determine what impact giving my energy away will have, what impact the things I share will have, what impact interacting with every person will have ! Which is why I no longer allow comments on my experience videos and I don’t allow every comment on the blog. And it’s also why from time to time I ignore people or I tell them to fuck off ! You wouldn’t believe the things people ask of me or how needy or dependent some people are ! And the worst people of all, are people with money ! I know there are a lot of good people with money who are regulars and I’m not talking about you. I’m taking about the people who write to me begging for help, who never offer anything in return – not even a thanks ! I just want to send those people an arsehole bomb !

I’ve said before that my time sharing my ET contact experiences is time limited. I can’t wait to disappear, to grow more trees and to publish my novels ! I like helping people and I really appreciate when other people understand what I’m trying to convey and learn to think about things for themselves. But sadly, that isn’t the majority. The majority want to be spoon fed and want something for nothing and want to take, take, take and never think for themselves. So all the work I do in relation to this subject, is for the very small minority who get it and who are open minded and open hearted enough to look beyond what’s popular. But it’s also for those who are yet unborn and for generations in the future who will look back and try to understand the small numbers of people who were in contact with ETs, who understood what it’s all about.



If I had my time again, I would remain invisible and keep everything out of the pubic domain. And that’s what I’d recommend to others in a similar position – stay invisible, cherish this as your own personal experience and share your experience only with people you trust in real life. Because at the end of the day, I’m not sure that it’s worth it overall. It isn’t worth the drama and the suffering ! But it is worth it in a host of small ways. The friendships and acquaintances are worth it ! Knowing that others are catching on to what I’m sharing makes it worth it ! Knowing that I’m helping a small number of people to understand themselves and the true nature of the self makes it worth it ! Knowing that I offer an antidote to the mass ignorance and stupidity makes it worth it ! Knowing that I can educate a small number of people about who the ETs are and what they’re like, is worth it !

I am however just one small man with a very small voice, that has something to say that is drowned out by the voice of the masses and the squeaky wheels. The only way that anything I do has any impact, is if others take what I have learned (or at least some of it) and apply it to their own lives and initiate their own ET contact and have their own relationships with beings from elsewhere. Then and only then, will anything I have ever had to say on the subject of ET contact, have any real and lasting value, to the betterment of humanity. Otherwise all this, is no more than dust in the wind.

Opening up about ET contact, is really a form of disclosure that forces bigotry to reveal itself. But it’s also about acknowledging our interconnectedness with all things. I for one have little patience for bigotry and all the time in the world for authentic connection !




TSM141 : Filters Through Which Humans Perceive Contact with the ‘Other’

I recently read Robbie Graham’s excellent book UFOs’ : Reframing the Debate and felt the need to explore the theme of how we perceive contact with the “other”, while out walking. When I listened to this monologue I realised it was so full of wind, that I’d have to can it (which is something I’ve done to about 20 monologues). But given it’s a long one (1:45:50) I decided to keep it. So please be warned, it’s full of wind in places and there was nothing I could do to prevent it or edit it out.

In this walk I take up the issue of how humans perceive and make sense of contact with the other. We could call the other ET but it’s not always clear at the time or after, that that’s exactly what it is. I ask how conditioning, belief, perception and self awareness determine how we make sense of an experience. I also suggest that these things change across the human life cycle (brain freeze – I couldn’t articulate this clearly at the time : and suggest that every human being having an experience sits at a certain point in the developmental cycle and as a result interprets the experience in a certain way

The point I try to emphasise is that how we perceive and the level of self awareness that we have, both determine how we see the world and how we interpret our experiences.

I suggest that contact with the other is leading us to a greater understanding of the self and reality. This understanding is helping us to grow in a way that helps us to engage more fully with the intelligence of the other.

Hang in there !

Bright. 😉



David Jacobs is Right But He’s Wrong

Over the years many people have thrown the research of David Jacobs at me to ponder because they feel that I’m wrong about the ETs and that they are abducting us to fulfill some seedy agenda. I stand by my argument that the notion of abduction represents the perception of one’s experiences at the lower end of the developmental spectrum ( and not what is actually happening.

I’ve read several of David’s books and listened to many of his interviews. He has done a lot of good work, although I can say little about how he does his regression work or the people that he has worked with.

As far as I can tell he is one of those researchers who sees the small picture – how ETs appear to be to the person who feels powerless. His belief that ETs are infiltrating the planet, is at best naive and myopic and at worst just downright stupid and dangerous. Because David doesn’t seem to have had any contact experiences himself (and no history of contact experiences), he lacks the insight to truly understand the nature of these experiences. While he is right about a great deal of ET contact being clandestine (or subversive), he is completely wrong in his conclusions about what this means and why the ETs function the way that they do.

To play into his conclusions (and the conclusions of others like him), logically leads us to conclude that we live in a dystopian universe where living beings are caught in a battle between the forces of evil and good. Which, based on my own experiences with ETs, is a faulty and unhealthy way of thinking.

I suggest that those who are interested in the subject of ET contact (by whatever name you call it), examine cautiously the claims of people who believe that ETs have a dark agenda and are a threat to us. To take such claims at face value, is to play into ignorance and to lose sight of the larger picture of how different ET races interact with one another and how sentient life has evolved.



TSM131 : Memory, Uncertainty & Doubt in the ET Contact Experience

The things in this monologue were probably the hardest things I’ve ever spoken about publicly.

Today, I open up and share my thoughts about memory, uncertainty and doubt in the ET contact experience, looking at two of my own experiences 23 years apart. I explore how contact with beings from elsewhere shatters your experience of reality and talk about why I think most people who have contact, avoid talking about uncertainty and doubt and why these things are really critical to making sense of the experience. I post this monologue with some hesitation but do so because I belive that we need to be as honest and transparent as we can be, if we are to truly understand the experience of human-ET contact.

There is some repetitive noise in the early part of the recording due to my shoes squeaking and the squeaking on my iPod cover.

Enjoy ! 😉

The One Thing You Need to Know About ETs – The Eyes Have It : Part 2

I dedicate this post to Sandor ! Thanks for all your ongoing support – it means so much ! 😉

This is a really difficult post to write and I’m not sure how well you will understand what I am trying to convey to you. But Dude insisted that this was the one post I need to write, to help you understand what ETs are really like. Ultimately that’s why I share anything about my experiences with the ETs. Because people need to penetrate the lies and deception, myths and lack of knowledge and hear first hand from someone who KNOWS, so that they can make up their own minds, free of distorted perspectives.

In Part 1 ( I focused on human eyes, so that you would have some sense of what we can all potentially see in the eyes of our own kind. But I also wanted to give you something, by way of contrast – so that you would truly understand the difference between our eyes and the ET eyes.

First I’ll speak generally about the eyes of beings from other worlds and then I’ll give you two examples from people who are my friends.

While we hold our eyes in a way that may reflect underlying anxieties and discomfort, often moving them around very quickly, ETs hold their eyes with much greater stability. It’s as if they can take in much more without having to move their eyes as much. As well as that, they are more stable emotionally.

Many (but not all ETs) do not have the peripheral features of the eye that we have – such as Lacrimal Glands in the corners of the eye, eyelashes, or residue in the eyes. Their eyes appear vibrant and fresh.

Many ETs do not have whites in their eyes or visible blood vessels. Their eyes do not exhibit any of the aspects of poor health that are often conveyed through the whites of our eyes.

All ETs I know of,  have an Iris of sorts. But I’m not sure whether we can say that their Iris’s contains a Stroma and Pigmented Epithelial Cells, as our eyes do. Their Irisis often appear to stretch around the entire eye and I have no idea how that works functionally. Perhaps the front and back of the eye have different functions. They do have great variation in colour between races and between individuals. Although some races have similar colours between individuals. ET Irises are exceedingly vibrant in colour and radiate an incredible sense of life. They do not exhibit any of the signs of ill health that affect our Irises. Of course different races have different shaped Irises. For example, the Muajra and Sar’won’dee appear to have circular Irises but the Sarpalxn appear to have an vertical ovoid cat like Iris.

The Pupil of ETs eyes have great variability. Some appear to contract and expand rapidly, while others contract and expand slowly. What they all seem to have in common is a strong sense of the life force. In many races it is completely and utterly engaging, like a magnet that sucks you in. It truly is a window to the soul ! And often, it is as if there is literally light radiating back at you. Not a reflection of light but actual light.

When you look into the eyes of most ETs, you have a powerful sense of BEING and that what you see is TRUTH.

So let me give you the examples I promised.

Some of you know about Dude of the Muajra. Dude’s Irises are a pale but vibrant green, with orange/gold flecks distributed equally through them – that are very reflective. The Iris goes all the way around the eye. When you look closer, it looks like a water colour that has different qualities/colours to it. There are no visible blood vessels or tear ducts (although he can cry). His eyes seem to change, depending on how you look at them. His Irises change with his emotions. Somehow emanating different subtle qualities. I’ve even noticed that his Pupils can contract to a point of almost dissapearing and it’s as if his Irises are taking in the light. When you look into Dude’s eyes, you are automatically engaged with him and depending on what he wants you to feel, you can feel the most intense emotions – more than sometimes you can handle. Dude uses this to his advantage when he is working with humans. People that piss him off are literally terrified by his eyes. But he can also be more loving than any human you could ever meet and make you feel as if you are one with God.

The Sar’won’dee (said Sawronde) have the most beautiful large eyes. My friend Taehelrs (said Tee-heesh) is one of the 8 ETs who I call the Beloved Carers, who visited me earlier this year and whom I have regular internal world contact. Taehelrs has very large eyes but they look proportional to the size of the head. He, like the rest of his people, have the most exotic blue Lapis Lazuli like blue Irises, with flecks of gold colour through them and well defined long Pupils. Every time I look into his eyes or the eyes of any of his people, I feel completely vulnerable and like I am HOME. By that I now mean (after my January 19th, 2011 encounter), that I am one with The Light that is all things. I have never known he or any of his people to show any kind of irritation or anger; unlike Dude, who uses it to ‘make things happen’. My ex wife jokes that they are the ‘happy happy aliens’ because they never show any negative emotion. Often when you look into any of the Sar’won’dee’s eyes you are flooded with moving images of whatever they wish you to know and you feel what they feel about what they are sharing. One look into Taehelrs or any of the Sar’won’dee’s eyes and you feel complete unconditional love and acceptance.

Looking into many of the ET’s eyes can be a truly humbling experience. Often when you look into their eyes you are overwhelmed emotionally and you become physically sick because it’s all too much. I can’t think of a single human who has the same capacity to transform us !

The eyes of an ET do not harbor hatred or hostility, emotional instability or ill health. They are honest and genuine, conveying truth and love. Those who say otherwise, are either unable to remain conscious with the ETs, are overwhelmed by fear and/or their own projections or have been deceived by those who perpetrate the abduction meme.

You can read more on the Muajra here : (or on the Who the Hell is Dude page) & the Sar’won’dee here :

ETs, Humans and the Illusion of Self

When I was a young boy I used to love visualising the scale of things. At some point I visualised everything that I was made of, from my body all the way down to the things that make up my atoms; and then changed directions and visualised my body and it’s place in the entire cosmos, starting with its place on Earth, moving up through all of the celestial bodies until there was only one whole. The capacity to visualise, helped me from an yearly age to understand my place in existence and the significance of my insignificance. In my early 20’s I started to read philosophy and science and particularly the works of the mathematician Paul Davies. And it’s through these works, I came to realise that from one perspective life and self are illusions. Soon after I discovered Buddhism and after a brief flirt with Tibetan Buddhism, I realised I knew very little about what a self really is. Later when I returned to Buddhism after a lot more life experience, I discovered the Buddha’s teachings on Dependent Origination or Dependent Arising and The 5 Aggregates. It was then that I truly understood that what we take to be a self is an illusion.

Dependent Origination or Dependent Arising is essentially the idea that things do not exist in and by themselves, they depend on other things and are composed of other things. A cube of sugar is not a cube of sugar without Carbon, Hydrogen, Oxygen and Nitrogen molecules binding together in a unique pattern to form Glucose. And each of these elements is not an element without their molecules being bound together in a particular configuration. And each these molecules is not a molecule without their protons, electrons and neutrons being bound together in a particular configuration (which may show signs of wave or particle behaviour). Everything in existence (matter and perhaps even energy) depends on something else for its existence and is composed of other things.

The 5 Aggregates are an assemblage of parts, if you will, that make up a human or animal. They include form, feeling, perception, mental fabrications and consciousness. They may have aspects which reflect the past, present or future, be internal or external, subtle or gross. We regard these aggregates as our own and collectively they constitute the self. The problem is that we regard each of these aggregates and the 5 of them together as something in our possession. This assemblage of parts make up our being, which we take to be permanent and real. Sometimes we grasp, reaching out for the 5 Aggregates and the self they create, clinging to them and becoming attached to them. At other times we develop a kind of repulsion to the 5 Aggregates and the self they create and try to avoid them. These cycles of attachment and aversion are based on the false premise that the self that we think we are is permanent. We forget that all phenomenon are impermanent and will not last forever. Each of the 5 Aggregates depends on the aggregation or assemblage of other components, parts or aspects and is susceptible to decay. Nothing in any of the 5 Aggregates has the quality of existing in and of itself and of being able to last forever. All of them obey a kind of law of transformation, in which they decay into other components, parts or aspects; becoming something else. Whilst Buddhism doesn’t recognise a soul or spirit, it does recognise a kind of subtle consciousness, which is the thing which creates mental projections after death and in life and the thing which takes on a body after death and in life and carries the mental imprints that we recognise as Karma. If there is a self according to Buddhism, it is the subtle consciousness which leaves the body at death with the Bardo of Death and continues in a new body with the Bardo of Becoming.

According to Buddhist philosophy, those that attain liberation from the illusion of self, enter the dimension of nothingness, where they see the ground luminosity of being. Which might be the same light of the Near Death Experience.

When you understand that the self is a construct composed of the 5 Aggregates, you soon see that all of the strivings of human existence are based on the false belief that the thing that you are is permanent and if you can get hold of the things you most desire, you can keep hold of them and attain something satisfying that will last forever. Buddhism suggests that the only sure way to freedom (liberation) is that you lose these false beliefs and lose all sense of self.

Later, after I had rediscovered Buddhism in it’s various schools and devoted myself to meditation, I discovered the many different teachings of Non Duality. The fundamental teaching of Non Duality, is that the there is only the One whole and that the individual I is an illusion. The greatest teacher of Neo Advaita, Ramana Maharshi suggested that that there are two selves – the I, which is the self we are all familiar with and the I:I, the true self, which exists in the background of the I. The I arises from the I:I. You’ve heard me talk before about the Small Self and the Greater Self, which is essentially the same thing. From a Non Duality perspective, the I or the Small Self which we take to be who we are, is just an illusion that is composed of perishable parts but the I:I or the Greater Self is our Real Self and is the only thing that is permanent. So when Ramana asks us “Who is it that is asking “Who Am I ?” ?” , he is asking us first to peel back the layers of the perceived self (the Small Self or the I) and see what exists behind it. When we do this we discover at first the intellectual experience of the Greater Self or I:I and then the felt experience of the Greater Self or I:I. Another way of saying this, is that when you penetrate what you really are and move past all the assembled parts or aggregates, you discover God. Or, when you surrender the self or I, only God remains.

So, this all sounds good in theory but how do we make use of it in real life. I think that first of all we have to come to a kind of acceptance of two things. A human being has both a relative self or a Small Self or an I, that exists as a separate body and mind that will live and die. It experiences desire and all manner of emotions. It is susceptible to grasping, craving, attachment, repulsion and aversion. It is impermanent and always hungry for something. A human being also has an absolute self or a Greater Self or the I:I, that is everything. It is within time and beyond time and cannot die. It is not susceptible to grasping, craving, attachment, repulsion or aversion; and although it may experience them, it is not bound to them. It experiences desire and all manner of emotions but once again, is not bound to them. But the Small Self and the Greater Self are not 2 distinguishable beings. They exist as aspects of being and between them, I believe there exists gradations of awareness or more or less aware aspects of the Smaller Self. Picture a continuum with the Small Self at one end and the Greater Self at the other end. In between lay a grey area in which an individual may experience different levels of awareness related to the totality of their being. Depending on what level of awareness an individual develops, one can deal with the challenges that present themselves to us in life and in death in different ways. When, for example we recognise impermanence in all phenomena, we can remain unfussed about anything that arises in life – be it fame or rejection, success or failure, sickness or health, prosperity or poverty, love or hate, or any of the countless desires or mental fabrications that pass through the mind. We ride the tides of change with indifference, knowing that all things change and nothing lasts forever. We know that our only sure abode and the only place of real security is emptiness.

Most humans don’t know the first thing about impermanence or the causes of suffering. Nor do they care. Space faring ETs on the other hand, understand that all phenomena are impermanent. But they also recognise the causes of suffering and the nature of the self. They are not however, limited to the insights of Buddha or Buddhism or Neo Advaita or the spiritual beliefs of India or China or any other group of people on Earth. My sense from my experiences with many different races of ETs, is that they understand that material life is short, especially for humans. They also understand that every living thing suffers and will die. They see the struggle of countless life forms and know that every life form must come to grips with the passage of it’s life and the experience of dying and existence after death. They know that all life has equal value and that no life form is any more deserving than any other. They understand in their own way, that life and the sense of self, arises from an assemblage of parts and that the sense of self is an illusion. But they also recognise that what I call the Small Self (which exists in relation to other Small Selves) has as much value as the Greater Self. They recognise that all life forms are unique expressions of self and unique expressions of the One – whatever they may call the One. They recognise that I am the One and that you are the One and that they are the One and that the ant under your foot is the One, as much as anything else is the One. And they know that all of these unique expressions of the One, are impermanent and because of their uniqueness and impermanence, they are absolutely precious. That is why they consider all life to be sacred. That doesn’t however mean that every ET treats every individual in the cosmos the same way. They have their own unique ways of expressing their beliefs.

When Dude recently said that ETs don’t have compassion, he meant that ETs treat life the way it should be treated because they SEE the nature of reality as it really is and that every unique expression of the One is susceptible to the same laws of impermanence and change. Dude may not talk of God, because he knows his true nature and the nature of reality and that there is no separation between the One and himself. His sense of self embraces the illusory aspects of self (the Small Self) and the permanent aspects of self (the Greater Self). He knows that creation arises within all that he is. Other ETs however, may conceive of reality in a different way to Dude’s people and construct reality and their sense of self in a different way. None of them are limited to human spirituality or philosophy but some of them may have ideas, conceptions and beliefs that are similar.

One of the things I find really fascinating and immensely liberating about my experiences with Dude, is that he encouraged me to embrace my desires. I went through a stage of analysing all of my desires, after having done it several years before and feeling like I needed to do something more serious about it for my own well being. And as I was doing it, Dude reminded me that desire is a fundamental quality of life. I was trying to identify healthy and unhealthy desires and weed out as many desires as I could because I was conscious that desire leads to aversion and attachment and causes suffering in life and death. Of course, you cannot erase desire without the desire to erase desire. So it’s a viscous circle that requires a certain level of acceptance about certain primal desires. Dude also reminded me that despite their outward appearances, many great spiritual teachers (past and present) (the Dalai Lama among them) live with desire and are afflicted with strong emotions like fear and existential hunger. Despite all of their outward commentaries on liberation from desire, they themselves are bound to desire. He went on to suggest that it is desire that creates experience and the opportunity for growth. You may remember me sharing the story of Dude’s leaf collecting interest and how that desire to collect 1 leaf from every plant on Earth, gave him the opportunity to collect at least 98 % of all of our plants and created countless opportunities for him to experience the many different life forms and places of our Earth. Through this experience he travelled to every continent, he met many many people and discovered the oldest plants on our world. He also, accidentally killed the last known plant of a particular species, when he pulled a leaf off it on the side of a cliff and it fell out of the small crack it was growing from. He later recreated an individual and replanted it. But he felt bad that he killed the plant that gave up it’s leaf. All of these experiences of collecting a single leaf, created opportunities for him to interact with life and discover things about our world and himself. The act of discovery helped him to grow and to mature and to learn and bring kindness to our world. Without that desire, he would be bereft of countless experiences that benefited both he and others. He would also be bereft of countless memories that have brought meaning and joy to his life. And it all began when my ex wife, as a 4 or 5 year old, gave him a a small leaf of the bracken fern he had been hiding behind, after he introduced himself to her, in the late 1960’s.

Dude and his people don’t discount the importance of desires or of suffering because they see equal value in the experience of the Small Self. The experience of individuality for them is as important as the experience of wholeness or the many different levels of awareness that the Small Self is capable of in life and death. Unlike hard core Buddhists, they don’t see the need to anchor one’s self to the certainty that the self is an illusion and that the only sure abode is emptiness. Instead they embrace the illusion and enjoy it for what it is.

But they go even further than this. They see that the inner and outer worlds are one. What is within the imagination, is what is within the whole and when they give energy to the imagination, they create in the outer world. Unlike many of our traditional spiritualities, that declare that what the mind creates is unreal, the Muajra, embrace all that the mind creates as possibility; knowing that they can create what they wish, with the right application of intention, feeling, imagination and energy.

So perhaps, if I was an ET, I would say that the real illusion of self, is that the Small Self is an illusion and that the Greater Self is real. And that the truth is that both the Small Self and the Greater Self are both illusions and both real. I and I:I are of equal value and both are illusions and both are real.

But what would I know, if neither You nor I are what we think we are ?

A Discussion with Dude about the Griffin Metaphor

Yesterday I was painting the lounge room in my dilapidated farm-house. I sat down for a minute to have a break. Dude had been in the house for a couple of minutes earlier in the day but then went away. When I sat down he popped into my head and made some comments about the metaphors I used to describe him (see earlier post below). He said three very interesting things, that I thought I’d share with you. First he told me that he liked the Griffin metaphor but that I was wrong. Second, he told me that his people (the Muajra) don’t have metaphors or use them at all. Third, he said that Griffin (in the movie Men in Black 3) depends on other people’s presence for a particular reality to be visible or to come into creation but his people don’t. So let me unpack the significance of the last two comments. Humans use metaphors all the time to describe things. According to Wikipedia a metaphor is “a figure of speech that identifies something as being the same as some unrelated thing for rhetorical effect, thus highlighting the similarities between the two.” Perhaps my post didn’t accurately reflect the use of metaphors but I think you understood what I was getting at. Wikipedia goes onto define two common types of metaphor :

  • “A dead metaphor is one in which the sense of a transferred image is absent. Examples: “to grasp a concept” and “to gather what you’ve understood” use physical action as a metaphor for understanding. Most people do not visualize the action—dead metaphors normally go unnoticed. Some people distinguish between a dead metaphor and a cliché. Others use “dead metaphor” to denote both.
  • A mixed metaphor is one that leaps from one identification to a second identification inconsistent with the first. “I smell a rat […] but I’ll nip him in the bud”—Irish politician Boyle Roche. This form is often used as a parody of metaphor itself: “If we can hit that bull’s-eye then the rest of the dominoes will fall like a house of cards… Checkmate.” — Futurama character Zapp Brannigan.”

And in addition it talks about applications of metaphors : The term metaphor is also used to describe more basic or general aspects of experience and cognition:

  • “A cognitive metaphor is the association of object to an experience outside the object’s environment
  • A conceptual metaphor is an underlying association that is systematic in both language and thought
  • A root metaphor is the underlying worldview that shapes an individual’s understanding of a situation
  • A nonlinguistic metaphor is an association between two nonlinguistic realms of experience
  • A visual metaphor uses an image to create the link between different ideas

Metaphors can also be implied and extended throughout pieces of literature.” So why does Dude’s statement have any significance at all ? Humans use metaphors in every language, every day. Metaphors saturate our language. They allow us to convey thoughts, ideas, concepts, beliefs, values and actions and ultimately they shape our perceptions. They play with time and space. Think for example about the following metaphors : The Big Bang, The Big Crunch, The Road Not Taken, The End of the Road, Broken Hearted, Run Out Of Steam, , The Path before Us, The Longest Journey Starts With The Smallest Step, Ghost In The Machine, All The Worlds A Stage, He Drowned In A Sea Of Grief, The Classroom Was  Zoo, It Was Hell, Life Is A Roller Coaster, A Bomb Went Off in His Bedroom, She’s A Night Owl, Shes Fishing For Something, Running Out Of Time, Stench Of Failure etc. They all point to something else, other than an experience or a thing itself. They use something else to embody meaning. Imagine if all of a sudden, we stopped thinking and speaking and conceiving in that way and simply spoke in plain language about how things ACTUALLY ARE. That’s how the Muajra function. And that IS COMPLETELY ALIEN TO OUR MINDS. Next time you have a chance to listen in on some conversation, take notice of how many metaphors you hear. Next time you have a chance to read a book, take notice of how many metaphors you read. Chances are you’ll be swimming in a sea of metaphors ! Now to Dude’s second comment. You’ll remember that Griffin is the multidimensional Archanan being in Men in Black 3 ( who carries the Arc Net Shield that can protect Earth against the Boglodites – who had previously wiped out Griffins people.The Archanans have “the unique ability to foresee the infinite potential outcomes that are dependent on the actions taken in any given scenario.The Archanans can “see an infinite number of alternate timelines and possible futures happening at the same time. They don’t know which future will specifically come true since they are happening all at once.” As I understand it, Griffin can ONLY  SEE potential outcomes when other individuals engage with a situation. He could only see one outcome for a baseball game that had taken place but when J & K were being hunted by Boris the Animal, Griffin could see many potential outcomes for that particular situation – outcomes that were dependent on who entered into the field of relevant activity and what they had been doing or were doing. But if I understood Dude correctly, the Muajra do not depend on an other individuals interacting with a situation, to be able to see potential outcomes, the most likely outcome and to create a given version of reality.  That might not sound very significant but actually, its hugely significant. What I think it means is this. Someone like Griffin exists in a shared reality, one that arises from shared experiences – in which reality depends on an environment that is rich with the interactions of others. I think that’s how most of us think we exist. Where as someone like Dude exists in a reality that exists in a reality that arises purely within their own individual consciousness. That perhaps is closer to how Buddhism suggest we exist. I think what Dude is hinting at, is that this reality we take to be real, in both past, present and future, is something that all of us are creating within consciousness. Although I am not sure that consciousness (or even mind) is the right word. If reality arises inside of us, instead of the other way round, where we arise inside of reality, then almost everything we have come to believe about how the world, life and the cosmos works, is completely wrong. Can you see why Dude says that time does not exist and that there is only space ? Perhaps all that exists is the space within ? Perhaps the space without is the space within ? The implications of what Dude explained to me are beyond comprehension and I’m not sure I conveyed it very well. So this is just a brief post to plant a seed inside of you. 😉 It is my wish that this will encourage each of you to reconsider the nature of reality and the nature of your own existence.

Some Little Stories About Dude

Those of you who know about my little friend Dude from MuajrH36 (, will know that he’s highly unpredictable and far from what you’d think a being from another world might be like. Every time he visits, he continues to surprise me. Yesterday he visited my ex wife and later she called me up and said “Dude was wondering if he shouldn’t just materialize right in front of you and crush an ant ! He wants people to know that all this love and light aliens stuff is bullshit !” So that caught me a little off  guard. I’ve actually seen Dude communing with ants, bent over talking to them and I know he really loves ants and is fascinated by them. So he just wouldn’t kill an ant for the hell of it. But he could do it if he wanted to. So I suppose the point he was trying to make is that some humans project all over ETs and turn them into a homogeneous blob, where everyone is the same. Sure there are many ETs, like the Teal’hia who are deeply compassionate and loving but others like Dude (and some others in his race), who can be cruel to be kind. They don’t practice the love and light approach, they practice the “this is how it is” approach. That doesn’t make them any less compassionate. They just have a different path for expressing compassion. And Dude is often like that. Honestly, I never  know what to expect from him. In one sense he is a lot like Paul from the movie of the same name. He’s deeply profound,  wise and caring but he’s also capable of great sarcasm, criticism, humour and of inflicting punishment on individual humans he feels deserve it. I feel blessed to have him in my life, even though it means he knows everything about me and I can have no secrets – nothing hidden, that is all my own. But Dude is also deeply respectful and he understands the value of privacy and individuality. And if there’s one thing I’ve got from him, it’s that life is so brief, we have to stop fucking around and wallowing in our sorrow and get on with making the most of it. Remember his comment “You’re hanging from a gossamer thread and have moments to live !” From his perspective of 8.000 years (remembering that his people die when they want to), human life is so very fragile and brief.

Dude has become a kind of mentor to me, a kind of guide and another expression of God (God knowing itself). Even though I have my own close ET (Anamika), I feel Dude is critical to my future. I can’t imagine life now without his presence. And it’s strange that he also takes an interest in my son and his well-being. After my ex-wife and I split, he could have said “Fuck you. You’re a pain in the ass and I’m having nothing to do with you !” But he didn’t. In fact he’s now more a part of my life than ever. Just why he chooses to watch out for me and to interact with me, I have no idea. I asked him last year when we were on board and he just gave me a funny look.

So, here’s just a few little stories about Dude that you may or may not have heard before. Let’s start recently. On the weekend I was back on my old farm, the place where I’m planning to move back to next month. I had been cleaning the lounge room walls with my son, preparing to paint them. I sat down that evening by the fire and my son and I had a turbulent argument about his electronics addiction and then I heard Dude’s voice in my head say “I’m just checking the stumps for termites.” He knew that I was concerned about any possible termite damage. He didn’t need to check the stumps but I think he was doing it for a reason. I could hear the stumps being hit but my son didn’t notice because he was angry. Then suddenly there was a bang on the floor under where we were sitting and my son nearly crapped himself ! Later, when I was sleeping in the tent I’d set up in the bedroom, he appeared just outside the tent and began shaking his arse and dancing, like Paul in the movie. Because he knows I like that movie, he’s always sending it up !

A few years ago my ex-wife was in a very difficult situation doing some work she hated. She fell over in a puddle of water and began crying. Dude suddenly appeared and grabbed her by the feet and dragged her through the puddle like a mop. He turned to her and said “This is reality. Get over it !” and disappeared. Although it seemed a very cruel thing to do, he was trying to bring her mind into the present moment and away from the thoughts that were bothering her.

Every few months Dude gives me an update on things that are happening in my son’s life. In the last two years my son has had lots of dramas with girls. he has a bad habit of falling a million miles an hour into very obsessive relationships with girls that think he’s perfect. He’s made a lot of mistakes that are causing him a lot of pain and Dude recognizes this and so he gives me little insights into what;s happening, so that I can try to guide my son. Without his insights, my son may have stumbled into some very damaging situations. In this context Dude is acting a little like a Big Brother or a Grandfather, keeping an eye on my son in ways that I cannot. My son absolutely hates it because between his mother and I, he has no secrets at all and we always know what’s happening in his life.

Once when my son and I went away for 4 days, Dude came to our house one night and invited several of the human looking ETs I have described as a Door Keepers, to come over for a movie marathon. They sat in our lounge room and had beer and pizza and popcorn, while watching the Predator and Aliens series. You’ll remember that Dude loves Horror and bad Science Fiction movies !  While he was in our house, one of my cats pissed on my sons bed, so Dude threw pop corn at it and kicked it up the bum. He then fed pizza to the cats because he doesn’t like cats and thought they might like pizza. They apparently ate it, which is a first for our cats ! I have never met any of the Doorway Keepers (though I apparently walked past one in a local KFC) and was so pissed off when Dude told me they were i our house ! When we got back there was pop corn on the floor and the cats looked very happy !

Many years ago when Dude first introduced himself to Rachel when she was 4 or 5, he did so by walking out of the bracken near where she was playing in her backyard. Dude used to visit her quite often and it seems he was keeping a very close eye on her. Her mum was a heavy alcoholic and Dude would often have to help her deal with the consequences of her moms drinking. Once when he mum fell down blind drunk and cut her arm on a broken bottle, she began bleeding profusely and Dude appeared in the lounge room and stopped her bleeding and wrapped her wound up, so that it would appear that Rachel saved her. Later after another drinking orgy, her mother nearly beat her to death, breaking her jaw and her skull. Rachel had forgotten the incident where Dude saved her moms life until only a few years ago. It seems that Dude knows everything about her life – what was and will be. And that even though he could have let her die and prevented the beating that Rachel believes caused her brain tumour, he didn’t. I think it was meant to happen and although Dude could have prevented it, he knew it had a role to play in her life.

On the first day that Rachel met Dude, he took her to Africa to meet lions. When Rachel was 5 or 6 he taught her to bilocate and began tutoring her in many of the skills that would later be recognized as critical to the covert group she would one day work for.

Once when Dude came to visit Rachel they played snakes and ladders and when he began losing he produced a rule snake – a huge python that began winding around Dude’s arm, until Rachel screamed and Dude sent the snake away. But not before he could ask “Do you wanna see a big ladder ?”.

Once when Rachel was talking to Dude about existence and God, he said that the answer to everything is 2.

When Rachel was in her early twenties, Dude brought his most recent child to visit her. The child was about 10 years old by our standards and still very much in a learning phase. Rachel was the first human she had ever met. Later she would meet other humans.The child was much shorter than Dude and very excited. She was wearing lots of things she had collected while she was out with her father – leaves and twigs and feathers and that sort of thing.  She began approaching Rachel at a distance and sat down at various intervals, moving slowly towards her, stopping and sitting, till eventually she worked up the courage to come up and touch her. As she touched Rachel arm, she turned to her father and said “Oh it’s warm !”. There began her first relationship with a human being.

Last September when Dude came to visit me and then took me on board his craft, he began by introducing me to the Number 1 (the ET in charge of the structure I call The Architecture). As soon as he introduced me, he just walked off. No pleasantries, nothing. Later when he came to take me to my room, he took me inside and one of the first things he showed me was the couch the craft had made, complete with recliner and pop out foot rest . He bounced a round like an excited child and kept making a big deal about how cool it was. Which it really was ! Later I saw him greeting several beings whose race I did not recognize and coordinating a meeting between they and another race I did not recognize. It is such a shock to be with Dude on his craft. he can be both a larrikin, your best and someone deadly serious who commands absolute respect.

That was my first conscious encounter on Dude’s craft. As I have said before, it was made specifically for him. And it’s absolutely huge. It doesn’t have a fixed number of rooms. Rooms are created as required. But when I was there I saw a number of personal rooms (similar to my own), meetings rooms, open meeting areas and rooms that fulfilled purposes that are beyond my comprehension. Dude has an intimate relationship with his craft. He gave it a name after a specific small event he had on Earth, that the craft responded to. But when most people addresses the craft, they will do so, according to the name that the craft gives them. It is always something deeply meaningful to the individual. Dude would protect his craft with his life because it is another living, feeling, sentient being.

During that same trip last year Dude took me to a very beautiful place on a world that his own father had taken him to as a child. When I was there I cried and Dude did something to cheer me up. As I sat there looking over this incredibly vibrant and majestic valley, Dude sat with me, feeling everything that I was feeling and for a short while I felt closer to him, then I have ever felt with another living being. By giving me that journey and the previous journey into the past and future, he gave me something that he didn’t have to give me. He did it because he wanted to and because he cares.

To be continued … eventually …


xxHey folks ! I’ve just arrived back from a week holiday in South Australia. On the way over to Adelaide, my son and I had another face to face ET encounter/visit between the towns of Padthway and Keith, while we were out camping last Wednesday night. Initially I didn’t remember the details of what happened. But it has been slowly trickling back. I hope on the weekend to go back into the experience and see if I can recall the complete experience. This encounter was a direct response to a request I made for contact, prior to heading away. I’ll try to post a detailed account when I can, sometime in the next few weeks.

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