Hey folks, how are you all ?
Well, I’m back after 10 days visiting my sick sister Susy in southern Queensland. To be honest, is was a fucking hard trip and I am absolutely relieved to be home ! Not because my sisters illness is unsettling but because my family is unbearable ! Susy’s brain tumours have not incapacitated her but they have definitely changed her behaviour ! I am not sure if I have the strength to see her again, while she is conscious or alive.
On the last day I contracted a severe flu, so I’ll be spending the rest of the week trying my best to recover.
While in the outer suburbs of Brisbane, I was exposed to the Affluenza (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Affluenza) that now effects large portions of Australian society ! I saw suburbs in which people spend all day manicuring 1 inch lawns and cleaning already clean drive ways and already clean cars ! Suburbs where every home has at least 3 cars, including 2 large cars. The shock of seeing Affluenza was so bad, that I actually had a visceral reaction to it and found myself having to shift my entire perception to another level, to avoid getting seriously sick ! The sense of keeping up with the Joneses and the sense of I and separation was so pronounced, that I truly felt like I was in an alien world !
Anyway, I’m back home in my crappy old dilapidated house, surrounded by trees and birds and quiet serenity and I am so immensely happy ! My body feels good, even though it’s sick !
A big thank you to Frederick, Marcel and Gabriele for your donations these past few weeks ! It is as always, very much appreciated ! Thank you for your sacrifice and for helping me through this difficult period of my life !
In other news, I’m still searching for an appropriate treatment for my tumours. It’s an incredibly difficult task, sifting through thousands of clinical trials, trying to find one that may be useful to my Renal Carcinoid Tumours. It’s also very unpleasant exposing myself to this material. But I’m confident I will find the treatments that Dude has suggested I explore and possibly some others. As I’ve said many times before, I’m now at the point where I need some treatment to deal with the reaction (which is the growth of my tumours) but it’s up to me to attend to the root causes (which are multifactorial). While I was away, I became away of several psychological blocks that represent several of these root causes and I think I can now transform them. So much of who we are and how we function psychologically and emotionally, is embedded in our families of origin. I think I needed a powerful physical reminder of that and I sure as hell had one while I was away !
In regards to this blog, I’ll try my best to knock something up once a week, depending on my health and commitments. If I work my arse off, I maybe able to have the e-version of the Dude interview out by the end of the year ! Many of you know that you can already download most of that here.
Take care friends,