An epiphany about contact
Hey friends, it is my wish that you are all well !
I little while ago I had a very profound epiphany, in which I came to see very clearly what many of the strands of my life are all about. I want to share it with you because it will help you understand what I’m all about and I believe, it will help you to understand what contact is really all about.
But first, let me tell you about the kind of little boy I used to be. One of my earliest memories, goes back to when I was just a babe in the crib and my family lived in Penang in Malaysia. I remember watching the geckos climbing over the walls and coming up to me in the crib. I would try to speak to them and touch them. I have another memory from about age 5, standing next to a friends above ground pool and being mesmerized by teh Water Boatmen that were swimming in the pool. In my mind, they were the most beautiful creatures I had ever seen. Later as a 9, 10 and 11 year old, I would take all kinds of crazy risks to catch lizards and snakes. I remember once I climbed over the sharp razor fence around an electrical substation to catch a Bearded Dragon. A little while later, I hid a venomous Brown Snake in my pocket, so my father wouldn’t find it. Then about a year later, while living in Hong Kong, I pulled a spitting Cobra out of some jungle creepers and threw it down near a friend and proceeded to play dodgems with it, as it spat poison at me. Needless to say my friend took off in a hurry (returning with his mum in their red ’65 MGB, trying to run over it !). Back then I craved contact with the natural world in all of it’s forms.
And to be honest who I was as a 7 year old, is the same as who I am now. You know the old adage “Give me a child until he is seven and I will give you the man !”. In my case, it is categorically true.
Today it is my love of the natural world and my connection with it that sustains me. I cannot go a day without being connected to the natural world in some small way. And I believe that all of the things that I have done with my life, reflect the same need for connection.
I have spent the last 28 years of my life trying to write and I think that my life as a writer, has been in some way an effort on my part to connect with my fellow human beings. My life as a therapist, has also been an effort on my part to connect with my fellow human beings. And all of the fringe activities that I have brought into my life, have been in a similar way, an effort to connect with something else. To have communion with the other and to feel bound together in some small way.
I have been thinking, feeling and doing, all of these activities now for a very long time; as like discrete little projects, little parcels that were separate from one another. And the epiphany that came to me, was that they are all the same thing – an effort to connect and to feel connected. After my being taken to Merge with the Light in 2011, I began to feel very different about my life and my place with Earth. I began to see how all division is but an illusion and how all division is just a perception of division from the whole. I had experienced the whole and I think, as a result I have been trying to understand and to experience more of the whole again. Which I suppose is something that I have been doing for my entire life.
A couple of years ago, I was reminded how I had had other experiences with the light, one at the beginning of my existence and others at various intervals. And so my experience in 2011, was a kind of reminder. A reminder that has ignited a real desire to awaken to the entirety of my being. I suppose in some way, all of these fringe experiences, are an expression of that. It’s something I have always done but it’s been pushed in a particular direction.
I think it will make more sense then, when I tell you that the following list, contains a series of activities that represent my urge to remember the Light and awaken to the entirety of my being :
- Connect with people from all walks of life
- Help to heal people
- Connect with ETs both physically and internally
- Connect with animals – particularly birds, ants, whales and reptiles
- Plant thousands of trees to help heal Earth
- Connect with trees (see my previous TSM on that subject)
- Connect with the Spirits of Earth (consciousness of plants, rocks, soil/sand, mountains, water, air/wind & Earth)
- Connect with Beings of Light/Balls of Light
- Visit individuals in the past and future
- Connect with those who have passed beyond physical life
- Connect with the myriad aspects of the Self
- Connect with God
- Connect with the Hairy Folk (Yowies)
- Connect with the beings that maybe the so called Bat Squatch
- Connect with the beings I call Pig Squealing (who I think are ETs but I am not absolutely sure)
- Connect with events, people and places through internal and external symbols (inner and outer are one)
- Connect with beings that identify themselves as Angels of Light (see my previous post on this/they were not actually angels)
- Connect with other entities – both with form and formless.
I suppose another aspect of my epiphany, has been that having life threatening/life affirming tumours, has taken me spiritually to a point where I see that life is truly only a dream. But a dream that we share with an infinite number of life forms. That together, are all expressions of The Light. That is the web that binds us. It is only through illness and confronting death, that I have seen clearly and experienced the fullness of life and understood experientially the Buddhas first two Noble Truth : Life is Dukkha/suffering and that suffering is caused by attachment and aversion. So when I connect with other beings, I understand this from a different perspective and that deepens my love of existence and of God and my appreciation for ALL of OUR SUFFERING and ALL of OUR STRUGGLE.
I don’t know if what I am trying to tell you makes any sense at all. It’s almost too hard to express. But this epiphany hasn’t just happened in one go. It continues to unfold sporadically and through its revelation, I am beginning to see value in everything – both good and bad. So it’s with that understanding that I can continue to connect with anything, no matter how frightening. Because every relationship, every creature, every being, every insight, every exchange between us; has value and has a purpose.
If one person can ignite a torch and be a torch bearer, others can see and others can follow. I’m not saying I am the first person to be like this but I am me. And if by being a torch bearer, I can illuminate the way, then I think, that is a good thing. But all torch bearers must ultimately pass on the torch. So perhaps, my sharing, is a way of passing on the torch and saying to you “Have courage. Enter the window of your fear and see what you find on the other side. For what you find, might just set fire to your life and remind you of what you truly are ! For you are The Light, remembering its way back home !”.